So this is Life as a diabetic...

Today I went to see my doctor, I have been going to urgent care to avoid me seeing him. My doctor, let me explain why I have not been going to see him.  He is like a big brother to me, one who you do not want to disappoint. Someone who when you go see him, the only reason you remember he is a doctor is the fact he has on the white coat and tells you to take a deep breath when he puts the stethoscope on your back. Otherwise its like a family member in which you just do not want to disappoint. Then my nurse, she is more like a friend. No we don't do lunch on my off days or talk on the fact. She just accepted me on her facebook (yeah I know lol). But she and I talk, laugh and I as nice as I am I am kind of mean to the other nurse. But today, I thought I would be able to go back to work and instead I was told I would have to get my shit together. Maybe not in those words but something like it.  My best friend has told me the HORRORS of being a diabetic and what I can look forward too if I don't get things like they need to be. Right now, I just took my numbers and I am AGAIN over 400.  So what the hell am I doing. I have so many family and friends worried. Not just those I know in my real life, but my virtual life as well. Funny how people you never seen before can care and worry about you and want you to take care of yourself.  Even with those who truly care and mean it I need to get my shit on point for ME!  I have a group on facebook that was meant to help each other go through the hard times and I am so ashamed of my NON progress that I don't even speak in it any longer. My reason for making the group was  to help others and it seems like I am the one who needs the help.  I want to just be happy in my life, I don't want anyone to fear sorry for me I want to be able to stand up and do what I need to do to live a happy healthy life. My numbers are SHIT, there I said it and in order for me to gain control I need to GAIN CONTROL. This blog btw won't be just about diabetes, dieting and trying to get control. There will be happy things too. My blogalk radio crap, my little black dress, my sims, my many projects.  Just needed to vent here. OK ALL DONE.

I AM BACK WORLD!

It has been a LONG time since I have sat at the computer and open up my blog.  Funny how something I use to do almost daily has become something I never do any longer.  However, I want that to change.  So here goes, hopefully I get others to read  (insert hopes and smiles here). I use to have a decent following on my blog. People actual wanted to read what I had to say. Then along came blogtalk radio and I found myself having those followers tune me in on the internet to hear my voice. Then came my on the grid talk show. Frankly, I prefer my blog talk radio more. I had more ppl listening and I felt more comfortable with the show over all.  There is a lot I want to share with each of you and I guess this will be a good way to do so.  So here goes. I AM BACK WORLD, stay tunned!